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Trump Indicted!

So tell us how the Big Orange and his tart are any different than the Big Gretch and her free aerial cart?

Indict them all. It’s only fair.

Have you downloaded the new Fast Pass Immigration App? We have. Under the name of Mike Hunt, along with my dog’s picture, we have applied for admittance. We now await our invitation from Secretary of Homeland Security Alejandro Myorkas for our new life in the shining city of Rochester on the Hill.

Once this happens, then maybe one day, some day, my dog and I will become developers in Detroit, and siphon the futures of all its children in order to bury our fathers in a $2 million marble crypt in the suburbs. Oh the Dream!

And if we make enough money, my dog and I will be able to afford the $14,618.50 that the Lansing Police Department wants to charge in order to find out if they knew the MSU gunman was firing his gun months from his porch before his murder spree.

Oh America! Land of the Freebie.

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Transcript:

Wow. That is quite the tower you built there. That’s pretty cool. Can you tell me about it?

You

Don’t want to tell. You don’t want to tell me about it. Okay?

Isn’t it so fancy

It? It is super fancy. Did the government give you any money or give you any help to build it?

No. I emailed it myself.

You build it yourself. Did you get any money from the government?

Well, they, hundred dollars.

They gave you a hundred dollars. Did it cost a build?

$10?

Wait, so you pocketed

98 90.

Did you build this in Detroit

Today? Yes.

Live downtown Detroit

Sister Breaking the double bullshit. Dobo bullshit.

Hello neighbors. Lovely day in the neighborhood fucking song again. You know what Grandma Betty once said? When your neighbor’s bad to him, to you, to your family, to your daughter, you just turned the other

Cheek.

That’s what you do. And if they fucked you again, the good Lord didn’t say what to do. I got breaking news.

Oh, nothing wants to work

Today. Fuck Mark

Baby. Beep beep, beep. Oh my God. Thank you, rod. That was much better

Update on the mass shooting in Lansing, Michigan. And why do we do this every week? We got a mass shooting. All right, but our young people were shot and we know, do we not? That the neighbors said the police have been out there multiple times. Yes. Yes. Because the man was shooting off his porch is exactly what I heard. Can somebody, can I get it? Amen or something. Amen. Thank you neighbor. Amen. Thank you, neighbor. Well, we released some tape Monday, kind of curious. Welfare check at the home. The old man’s found all pummeled on the ground. The sun was there. So somebody made the call to nine one one. Yeah. Who was that exactly? Who? How come people won’t say so? We know the police have been out there. You know that I asked for well over a month and a half now for more specificity, did the Lansing police ever respond in that neighborhood to a disturbance, to some shots?
They have any contact with the homicidal maniac? Was there a chance, had we done police work, right, that some people would be alive today? Am I right here? I totally agree. I mean, how many gun laws you want to come up with when you got gun laws? I’m, I’m not against gun laws. Gun owner, not against gun laws. Background check. Don’t hear me complaining. I crossed my fingers when I do a background check. I do now and don’t remember, I went on the government website and registered to come into the United States over the app. I wonder if that’s going to cost me. We’ll get to that later. I got my answer. Freedom of information. This letter’s in response to your freedom of information request, quoting 9 1 1 calls. I asked for it. I request all records for all calls for service, including but not limited to the computer assisted dispatch notes from January, 2019 to present for the following streets and avenues.
East Howell, east Jackson, Creston, cen, Bates, Cedar Paulson, community, Harris and Gary Avenue, everything in the vicinity. I talked to the FOIA coordinator and she says Cedar is really long, really long. Goes all the way across Lansing. I said, she goes, you mean in the vicinity of the house? I said, exactly. So we have an understanding of what I’m looking for. Okay? Also, I admit four years might be a little much, but okay, we can try two years, right? Anyway, here’s what we’re saying. The costs for that will be $14,618 and 50 cents. Oh my God. $14,618 and 50 cents. And there’s some good news in this. You only have to give me a down payment for $7,309 and 25 cents. So there’s a little reprieve there. Moreover, we will require four and a half months to compile this, what? Four and a half months. So in the wake of the shooting, we’ve got every swinging dick out there. Press conferences, live streams, right?

Politicians sharing,

Costing lots of money. 14 grand.

I want to know how much ink and paper they got to use. Is it that many? 9 1 1 calls.

If you’re going to try to be funny, then be funny.

Hey,

That was funny. But isn’t everything electronic at this point? And wouldn’t they be able to cross reference and put a filter in and be able to extract that information?

Thank you. You know what they said? We got about 2000 calls. Okay? How long does that take? $7 and 50 cents a call. All right. Tell you what, I’m go, I’m going to go out of pocket again. Get back to my lawyer, get this thing whittled down. I’m going to go out there and I’m going to write down every address. Do you see how gross this is? How much money Whitmer and Duggan are throwing around a rich people? And we want an answer about our children and about our police.

Well, the lack of urgency too. They said it would take that long. What? That’s incredible that it would even you think? Yeah. You think they might want to be on top of it? Smell.

I smell That’s a stall tactic. That’s what I, that’s stall tactics.

And what are they stalling about? Karen has Karen, Karen’s actually done this for a living.

Stalled.

Oh yeah. Oh shit. The fuck. Media came up, down, hit em with the 14645 cent.

They got me at $40 and 25 cent as much to get some information. You can have it.

It’s just a matter of how bad badly do you want it? So we’re going to make you wait and we’re going to make you pay. And if in fact you will pay and wait, then maybe we’ll get it. But Prime probably you’ll forget about it or abandon the thought of trying to get

It. And I must say in the memory, and I apologize if anybody is a loved one of anybody injured or murdered, I’m only saying it is in a right’s way. The authorities didn’t go fuck yourself. I find us to be the deepest outrage, especially in light of what happened in Nashville and what’s going to happen next week that you would treat us like this isn’t from me. We want to know. And by the way, I’m starting to get the snowball. Oh, you want to know about 9 1 1 and Lansing? Well, yeah, I do. Oh, well. Yeah, I do. And I’m starting to see it. I asked you, and it’s a clause, madam, that you wave all feels, because this is of high public interest. I’m all the good people of this state. All my brothers and sisters and my nieces and nephews, this is for a better society. This isn’t for Splash. I just know you’re driving around and we’re trying to keep you hanging out because we got more breaking news. But this is

Deep. I mean, it’s real deep because it shows that the machine is now came up with this way to keep from giving us information and it’s basically I’ll price it, make it too costly, make it too long. Either you going to forget about it or you going to give up. And that’s not how. But this

Is also about accountability. I mean, we’re not asking for anything that he as a resident and a member of the media are and is not entitled to. I mean, so it’s not like it should be a secret and all that information should be readily accessible at the click of a few buttons.

And you would think that they would’ve done this already. Yeah, yeah. But it’s not exactly germane to the events. You know what I’m saying? This is now looking at how you’re running an apartment and it’s almost gross to think about actually people younger than me. Right? I’m, because I’m getting up there now that this is a political matter and it’s hide your ass because now I fully believe it’s hide your ass because the 14 thou the only thing I can get, the 14 thou, I can get it by earning it. I don’t even have to go into politics. I couldn’t get that tomorrow because I know everybody in this state will pony up a penny for some truth in a minute. Yeah, but doing this, I got,

Yeah, that’s not cool. That’s not cool at all.

Oh, it’s beyond not cool. I don’t even, go ahead. I don’t want to get ahead of myself on this, but oh, there’s something real wrong here. Oh,

I, in my opinion, feel that they really don’t want to have to go into detail with it. Not just you, us or the public with themselves or how bad things are being ran,

But nobody else is asking these questions. That’s the other thing. I mean, that’s something else people need to look at. Not only do they not want to respond or answer Charlie’s inquiries, nobody else is asking these questions. Nobody else is trying to connect the dots to see what they are interpreting as potential liability. That’s the only reason why they’re pushing back.

Let’s do this. Okay, so instead of 19, I picked 2019, that’s when he got picked up on the weapons charge. Because I want to know if he was actually shooting when he was on a weapons charge, because I’m not stupid enough to overlook that. Right? Right. The guy’s on probation, was he doing the weapon? Okay. Right. So let’s say I do it to two years. What’s that? $7,500 now. And that’s only two and a quarter months. And if I go right down every address, what is that? $3,500 and two months? Is this what you’re telling me? Because watch this, Lansing, you don’t think I know chia police? You don’t think I know how easy it is to get this stuff? And the reason you won’t give it, do you think, I’m not talking to law enforcement. Do you think law enforcement thinks your behavior is outrageous? Because it is. Because the country’s fucking hurting and they’re dying. And if there’s one thing that we can, it’s how do our public servants behave and we’re not out there to hang anybody out to dry because it always goes at the top. So don’t think it’s rank file.

The people just want to know the truth. People want to know that the people that we put in place,

People want to answer, dude. Not just the truth, but the answer arrives from the fucking truth.

Right?

Sorry.

Nah,

You were going to say something funny.

No, I wasn’t. Are you sure

About that?

I didn’t. I fucking smoked weed

Again. Wait, you mean that guy? That doesn’t look

Like I, no, it may be the tooth. I ain’t got nothing to do with a little piece of joint. Lemme look. Lemme look. Oh boy. No, there’s nothing you can do with this. And you’re not a licensed then. I’m not about to just

Look. I tell you if there’s

Something fucked up, it’s a what is happening. It’s ace.

Did you say he

Got a I said abscessed. I did not say acid. Did you

Just say abscess?

Yes, I did.

Okay, let me

Look. No, well, for what

I want, because it’s swollen, dude, and you

Could die. I, okay, well, if I die, let it happen on the show, we get better ratings. Let

Me look. Let

Me look. Open it. Ah. Ah. No, I’m not doing that. No, no, no. You got shit. No more important shit to talk about. I

Didn’t see a fucking tooth in that head.

They all in my pocket. Fuck you.

Because if you don’t laugh, you’re going to cry. That’s why we got the funny man on.

We got

Breaking. He’s in pain, Charlie. Yeah, he’s in pain.

We’re cubby glancing. You’re going to answer that. We have more breaking news. Donald Trump has been indicted.
Now, Trump paid a porn queen to keep quiet. He’s admitted as much, but he denies the affair ever happened. So by this twist of logic, the Don paid $130,000 to a liar to keep quiet about a lie in the run up to the 2016 election. His disclaimer is insulting. I’m not a fan of the guy, but now he’s been charged by the Manhattan District Attorney and the grand jury. Those charges not only stretch the outer limits of credulity, but they will irreparably damaged the institution of the presidency. You blame who you want, but that’s what’s going to happen. The charges expose a yawning double standard in the application of campaign finance law once Trump’s salacious details are removed. Now, the short argument from the grand jury in Manhattan goes something like this. Trump made the payment then falsely claimed it as a legal expense, and faking business records is a crime in New York.
The jury didn’t seem to mind that the statute of limitations had expired. DA Alvin Bragg supercharged that misdemeanor by linking it to another crime, thus creating a felony. The second crime campaign finance violation. The tortured Manhattan Logic here is that the hush money payment was intended to help Trump’s presidential campaign, and thus should have been recorded in those filings. Nevermind that Trump was running for a federal office, not statewide in New York, and nevermind the president. This sets that. Anything that’s beneficial to you if you’re running for public office is a decent person can now be held against you. Not that that’s what Trump was doing. I’m just saying they say a grand jury can indict a ham sandwich. And in Manhattan this evening, they did along with a sidecar of Bloody Mary’s. Which brings me to the double standard here in Michigan where we choose to indict a slice of pizza in a can of pst.
Remember Michigan Governor, Gretchen Whitmer and her infamous airplane rides Two years ago, Gretch convinced some local businessmen in the height of the pandemic to let her fly Vaxxed on a private jet to Florida to visit her sick daddy. Nevermind that Michigan had a death rate 250% higher than Florida, or that the governor told us not to go to Florida at all. She never offered to reimburse the businessmen until I caught her. Then two months later, after that trip, Whitmer Camp claimed to the IRS no less that it was a charity trip paid for by her 5 0 1 [inaudible]. That’s the type of slush fund that helps send Kwame kill Patrick to prison. When that was exposed as being illegal, Whitmer handlers foist the cost of the jet onto her campaign fund, claiming it was part of doing business as governor. But what official business that she conduct, Whitmer never said there were no expenses filed with the trip.
No calendar was ever released. Whitmer only said that she went to West Palm Beach to cook meals for her sick daddy and hang on the beach with her spring breaking college daughters. Then we started digging some more. And when you know it, more covert plane rides emerged from the fog of Witmer’s political financial swamp. The cost of those trips two were funneled to the campaign account. It doesn’t appear that Whitmer was ever going to pay for her free plane rides and apparent violation of state campaign laws and the public’s trust. And by the way, whoever had the airplane and I know had the airplane, you’re not allowed to charge anyway. So where are the checks? Who took them? They can’t take a nickel for it. You see the parallels, state filings, federal filings, campaign accounts, funny money, trim,

Trump,

We going to call him trim.

Now. Trim

President. Trim. I’m going to call him trim, trim, trim and his stripper make for better headlines, but both he and Whitmer played fast and lose with the law. And both are guilty of gaslighting. We the public. Trump tells Whoppers and expects us to believe him. Whitmer has never offered a good explanation at all. And during her reelection campaign last year, she was never even asked the question. Even though plane gate consumed her administration for an entire month. Now Trump has been indicted. So in the spirit of equality and equal justice for all, someone ought to take a second look at Whitmer. After all, what’s good for the goose is good for the Michigander. This way you say stuff so we don’t got dead silence.

Yeah, I was about to say, I just think they’ve given Trump a whole lot of free campaign advertising. Oh yeah. I mean, honestly, you think something going to come with this indictment?

Nope.

Mark has an idea. What is that?

That what’s going to come from

Me? Because you went like this. If you’re just get it close. Get it close. I’ve been sure on you. I’ll be sure how you do it. Hang on. This is how you do it. You go like this.

No, but within that rant, I think the interesting thing is how many times she’s moved, where that money came from or where it was supposed to come from. Kind of trying to get ahead of, oh, if this is illegal, then maybe this isn’t. And if this is, well, then that’s illegal, so maybe I should do this. I mean, it’s just the bouncing ball keeps moving. So if someone’s being evasive like that, it’s like they know they did wrong.

So

Own up to it. Someone ask her.

But politicians, if I dare may say, I mean, if you’re going to be a criminal, take some some touch. Take some points from street criminals. Don’t pay in checks. If you’re going to pay somebody illegally, pay ’em in cash. You don’t want to create a track. You don’t want to create a track record or paper trail, a

Trump record, head

A trip. Here’s what you do when you trip. You pay ’em in lobster and fur coats.

So when you trick shrimp, don’t pay by check.

But it’s even dumber than that. He could have just paid by check from his own personal bank account. And it’s not an issue at all. It’s not. It’s just an nda. But instead of funneling it for Michael Cohen, the check, no, I know. We’ll

Pay a hooker check. That makes no sense.

High class.

First of all, I don’t remember the last time I was in the strip club. The strippers took a check. She normally wants cash, even if it’s the kind that hurts her.

Not your check, dude. Because right next to if you were bored on this date before 2001, you get to drink. And the sign next to that is do not take fucking checks from this guy.

Checks. Holy mess. Shit

It going fuck the whole country up, man. Oh

Yeah. I got to admit though, I, I’m kind of entertained by the whole circus of it. I was wearing very thin at the end of his presidency because it was a ridiculous story every single day. And I wanted a boring president. I never thought he would be this incredibly bad and boring. And now I’m kind of enjoying the Trump circus again. I’ll admit it.

Well,

But that’s what it is. It’s a distraction. I, and that that’s exactly what it is. So let’s just pay attention to what else is happening that we’re not being told about. That probably impacts us and has more importance than Donald Trump being indicted.

Oh, I have such news. Breaking news. Breaking

News.

The southern border is out of fucking control, out of control. Now, a Secretary of Homeland Security, Alejandro Maoris, gave some testimony to the a Senate oversight Committee. Who is this?

Josh Hawley. Yeah, Senator from

Missouri. Missouri. Yeah. So they’re questioning about you. You’ve all remember the app. Remember the app in January when and record numbers have flown over the border. Yeah. 200 people on the Terror Watch list, the first of which we reported of course. And how you doing? I hope you’re enjoying Dearborn. It’s great. Nobody gives a fuck. Great.

It did just

Disappear. Terrific. Right? So he created in an app, and what they’re trying to do was the most people coming over were Haitians, Cubans, Venezuelans and Nicaraguans and Venezuela and Nicaragua won’t even take their people back. Just fuck you. We’re not taking ’em back. Don’t matter who they are. Empty out the prison like your problem. Mexico, your problem. United States, no return problem. So they came up with an app. An app. Nevermind going through the proper channels and stuff. All you got to do is download it and then put in your stuff and we’ll have you come to the border. And if we deem you to be in dire need, we’re going to wave you in. Except I know this today, Nicaraguans, Cubans, Haitians and Venezuelans aren’t allowed to use the app. The one that they sold to us on January 5th. Like you use the app and stop bum rushing or will deport you. They don’t even get to use it. They have to get a sponsor in the United States to file paperwork. The app is for everyone else. Should we hear a little bit of the

Back and forth?

A little back and forth between

Holly and Mayorkas. Thank you.

January of this year. You rolled out a new phone app called CBP one, an app for a cell phone. I’ve got a picture of it behind Mihir. This phone app allows, and I’m going to quote from your own fact sheet. It allows anti quote, non-citizens without appropriate documents for admission to schedule an appointment to come to the border. They can now go on their phone and schedule a time to come to the border and then be admitted. And you identified seven separate border points of entry where they could come. Five of them in Texas, two of them in California, one in Arizona. It’s like a concierge service for illegal immigrants. My question is, you didn’t think the border crisis was bad enough that now we’re going to have an app that allows illegals to schedule their appointments and come and be admitted to this country.

Senator, you’re mischaracterizing the use of the application. Let me explain it to you. We are currently enforcing the public health order of Title 42, and I know you’re very familiar with it. There is a process for individuals who claim an exception to the Title 42 expulsion authority because of an acute medical condition. Well, let’s talk about this urgent app urgent, if I may finish an urgent, an urgent humanitarian reason. So instead of them coming in between the ports of entry to claim that urgent medical condition, that extraordinarily acute humanitarian cause, we allow a limited number to arrive at our ports of entry and seek the emergency relief that they need.

Schedule. You allow them be, let’s be particular about what you

Do. And I should say that the CPP one app was not unveiled for the first time on January 5th of this year.

Oh, oh no, but you changed it. You made it available on January 5th to the illegals themselves. You don’t have to be a lawyer to use it. You don’t have to be a member of a non-governmental organization. Anybody can download the app and use it on their phone and for the first time you allow them to schedule appointments. Now, let’s talk about what actually happens when they come to the border. It’s interesting you characterize this when you roll it out as an application for applying for asylum, but nowhere on the app do you actually require the illegal migrants to apply for asylum or to claim asylum or anything about asylum. And in fact, when they then get to the border, you don’t ask them questions. You don’t do interviews, you just release them. Here’s the Texas Monthly, not a notable conservative outlet who reports, and I quote, at no point does the app ask users, are you seeking asylum? Those arriving for the CBP one appointments are given, no interviews asked, no questions about vulnerabilities that they may or may not have listed in the app or about why they’re coming to the United States. They’re simply released into the country in quote. So rather than building a wall, Mr. Secretary, you have built Ticketmaster for illegal immigrants

And this ain’t even the best show on earth right now. Well, today, ladies and gentlemen, I downloaded,

Is it free?

It’s free.

We charge 99 cents. It’s really

Back to the government. It’s really junky. It’s got it’s, it’s like three stars. I mean, there’s more than a million downloads and it’s

Only got three

Stars. These refugees are mad because it doesn’t work. So it’s got over a million downloads, which should tell you something. Now here’s what I did. As I went in, I gave him my email. I gave him my name. Yeah, Mike Hunt. They needed a picture. My dog.
Okay, and here’s what they asked me, the vulnerability criteria. Do you have a physical or mental illness, disability, pregnancy, no access to safe housing in Mexico. You’re under the age of 21. You’re over the age of 70 or you’ve been threatened or harmed while in Mexico. That’s it. No question. No question at all about asylum, how you were treated in a home. Did you face violence? Was there a political hit group after you? None of that. I would say, do we want to take the mentally ill from Mexico? We got enough of our own right here. Well, you’re a racist man. How’s that? I can’t stop nobody from doing anything just because he’s mentally a brown guy.
Not at all. We just got enough for our home. So the administration likes to do that. I like to do math last year, more or less. Last February. You have to do year to year like you do inflation because different things happen at different times of the year. There were 150,000 people apprehended at the border. It was a record for a February. That was last year. Yeah, this year they’re crowing. We’re down from 250,000, which was December, which was a record. December’s always the record. You don’t compare February to December. You compare February to February. Yeah. Right, right. So last year was 150,000. So far this year, 130,000 detained at the border and another 26,000 that we can measure, were waved through. It’s the same number and we don’t have the number of how many people you actually gave the appointment to and brought through on the app because the app don’t work. Now, my liberal friends, my conservative friends, calm down. My liberal friends. What does this mean? This means that the Biden administration is incompetent. That it sent a signal to the world’s hungry and poor that were open for business. When the business became funny business, they reverted back to Trump Point one. Have you seen one single report about our detention facilities in the state of these squalled cattle pens? No.
Did you see the video of the people that we pushed out? Title 42, the Covid rules, which will expire in six weeks. So I told you, you remember I went to the border. There are tens and tens and hundreds of thousands of people encouraged to come waiting. Some can’t wait. Last night in El Paso, 1000 people bu rushed. I don’t know about you. I want to vet everybody, but I understand when you destitute, when you’re sleeping in the streets of Mexico with a tattered blanket, you ran out of money, you are pregnant. You got a five year old, you’re desperate. I would do it, but I don’t expect my government to encourage a human calamity. When we sent the people back, once you’ve been deported and you’re in that computer, you can’t come back in. So now the Mexicans are taking them. They don’t want ’em. They’re starting to deport ’em. But they were in a holding facility in Juarez across from El Paso. Two days ago it caught on fire and 39 people died. You cannot tell me, this does not bother your conscience, and you cannot tell me if this happened under the Trump administration, that you would be silent. We must speak, and here’s some video released from that facility. Don’t play it yet.
If you’re listening, you, I recommend that you come find us online, Facebook, YouTube, all of that. It’s there. This is the videotape where you’re looking at the Mexican officials who know that the jailhouse is on fire, cavalierly walking around, checking their cell phones and leaving while human beings die. You can see the flames in the left there. Can you see that? Yeah. Yeah. It’s starting to rip through the jail. Do you see the men banging on the bars? Let us out. They’re trying to get out in those. See the men checking his cell phone? Yep. They leave

And they leave ’em in there. Oh,

They door. Oh, the human beings are going crazy. Look at the, oh my God.

How

Could

You? I don’t know how you can do that. Oh my. That’s murder.

They’re being charged with murder as I read. Yeah. Not our original reporting’s. That’s murder and that’s, yeah, it is. That’s what’s going on. And you don’t know it because everybody watches TV and everybody’s so college educated that just the real life shit. The smell of people, what hunger means when somebody’s shivering comes out of the Rio and they’re from Havana and they’re real, real cool and they’re smiling and they’re dreaming of Miami and they just want a cigarette and border patrol going, beat my ass up. I give ’em a cigarette. I gave the whole fucking pack, and I wish ’em good luck. But this is bad policy. And for everybody to be divided doesn’t help anybody in this world.

Not at all. I just really don’t see what they expect to accomplish with this. I mean, it’s no wall, no nothing. You give them a app that don’t even work what you expect them to do, they won’t end. It’s putting stress on the border patrol too, I would feel. I mean, they’re already

Doc encouraging them. Yeah, yeah. Set up a program in their home country where it’s a lottery. Right. You again, I want to say it again. Justin Trudeau, who very well pretends he’s a liberal, welcomes Canada with open arms. The whole world can come. We’re a welcoming nation until you get 40,000 people from the United States and they quietly for years have been muscling the United States to take everybody back Safe. Third country, right? You’re from one country, you’re coming to my country. But there was a third one you landed in first apply there. So we’ve agreed to it. Why aren’t we asking Mexico to do it? Because Mexico will stop letting Guatemala do it. Guatemala will stop letting Ecuador do it. Ecuador will stop letting the Chinese come in.

Quit letting them move up the board without no kind of stop. They going head for go.

But why is being right, being fair and just doing the right thing? Why is that so difficult? I mean, just across the board. Why is it so hard?

I got to just think. Good question. I just don’t think people know what fair is. I, I think our lives in America have just become infotainment and so few of us are even furious. Yeah. I

Was just watching people doing things that, things that are inhumane, doing things that are not in the best interest of just basic human compassion. Not connecting people to available resources that make sense without complicating it with more process. That’s not brain surgery.

Did I bring up Lansing? Yeah. Is this at every level of everything?

It’s like the new phase of all politics. Hide it, ignore it, or overcharged to get the real information about it.

Don’t you start going political because then we got fucking Derek over in fucking Windsor.

My bad Derek.

Right? Telling us too much politics.

Oh,

Really? More Reddi than Norman Day. Hey, Derek, motherfucker, I don’t tell you how to put out fires. Tell us how to do this. It’s not easy being smart and right all the time.

You sound like a politician.

Oh my God. Did you see Slotkin? She doing her guns

To control. Wow.

Yeah. Well, they’re giving her a cake walk.

Well, make no mistake about it. They push her forward because they know she’s running for the Senate seat, right? Yeah. Yeah. That’s why she’s the one pushing that bill. Well,

She

Sits out. Oh, granted, there’s

State committee

Oxford, so I understand that. But still

Mean she’s on, she used to be on Homeland Security. Yeah. I never knew her to go to the border. Nope. Now she’s on Intel or something. Come the fuck on. Hold some people to account media for God’s sake. Dinos Democrats and name only. It’s mine. It’s mine. We need t-shirts. What’s up with the T-shirts?

That’s crazy. I don’t know.

Who’s fucking garage. Are these T-shirts in

Trudy’s? Not mine. That’s what I know.

She could at least wear one.

I don’t even still don’t even have a t-shirt. And I offered to pay for it. I don’t have a t-shirt. We’ll

Fix it. Pose

What? Making T-shirts.

Getting carry a t-shirt that I promised

Him to two years ago.

What a

Dump. I’m just going to shrink mine and give it to you,

Karen. Don’t turn it off. Okay. I nobody chair.

I’ll tie it around my waist.

What’s that?

I said I’ll tie it around my waist. I’ll wear it large.

Yeah. It’ll be a nightgown

Where Charlie go. Did he abandon

Us? No, he’s fine.

I was over there having a drink of beer and imagining you a night

Gown. He was feeding the fish like Fred Rogers.

Like Tony. Fuck a surprise. Okay, there you

Go. Yeah. That way. Yeah. Feed

The fucking fish over here. Now, speaking of, why can’t we do anything? Let’s just, let’s wrap this up because we, I’m going to be doing my BFF on Monday. I’m going to New York again. Do Cuomo.

Oh.

So we’re going to let Karen and Red get deeper into this on Monday. But this damned district, Detroit, oh gosh. Bullshit passed the, we just handed billionaires millions. I’m just leaving that in case anybody’s got anything to say before I get into it.

Well, they were supposed to vote last Tuesday, and then they decided we need more public feedback on this.

You mean they hid it?

They hid it for a week. Yeah. I mean, I’ve been following the story. I had no idea they were going to vote this past Tuesday. You’re telling me a week.

But that’s

The point. A week is enough time for more public input.

But that’s the plan. That’s the strategy and that, that’s actually what my upcoming column is about. I mean, it’s that. It’s the same thing. The MO is to pretend like public input and opinion matter and it doesn’t because if you heard council members when after their vote, they all gave some really weak attempt at justifying their yes votes. It was absolutely insulting. But this is what they do. Usually if it’s something, you know, they talk about it and they bring it back as a line item and approve it so quietly. This time everybody was just paying attention and you don’t even know what happened.

Yeah. I mean, that counts so dumb that the male members of it got to be naked to count of 21. I didn’t even know goddamn damn thing about a number.

I don’t think I, I’m not surprised it passed. I knew you knew it was always going to pass, but I,

Okay, so then we just jump into the, okay. Now we just are so fond around here doing race talk, right? Yeah. Oh, the rich white man. Oh, the fucking contract one, hire a black, black man. Look, this is your representatives, your city council. They’re all in the bag together and they’ve got you fucking around. And some people out there believe like this, this going to make us money. I can give you the money right now. Simple. Marcos, be careful of numbers. When I first went into tv, they’re like, be careful of numbers. I’m like, people get numbers. Oh yeah.

Like

20 million minus 10 million is not zero million. Again, 20 million. Million minus 10 million is not zero million. You just do it twice. That’d be 10 million. Okay. Even your daughter. No, your daughter does good Detroit math. Right? I built it for $10. They gave me a hundred dollars.

That’s summed it all up right there.

Right? That was like the best two minute peas. Even the child

Unprompted too. Yeah.

Yeah. She even, she gets it. So how come these grown adults

Can’t get it? Because they’re getting something too. That’s why it’s their job and they’re getting donations and it’s just, it’s such a racket. It’s a

Fucking, and Mark Manny spends a lot of time worrying about his babies. He really does. And brother, I’m here to tell you right now, no matter what happens, there’s always work for her in Lansing. Right.

You got it all figured out,

Mark. Yeah, I know. All

You got to do is Senator to Michigan State.

Fine. I don’t care. I don’t want her to go there, but I don’t care

Why. Yeah,

Why? Well, I’m on Wolverine, you know that I’m I’m joking. Wherever they go is fine.

It’s good to B Hey Michigan Wolverine. That’s right. It’s good to B Oh, is my old cheerleader coming out. It’s so embarrassing.

It’s

Not. Did you like that?

It is very good.

Look at that. National champs. It’s a big thing. Now

What

Cheerleading?

You mean? It wasn’t

Male cheerleading.

You get colleges a college scholarships. Think to college

Now. You think’s doing all the double back flips.

Yeah. No, it’s athletic. You know what? Don’t do one. Charles. I’m sure it was a ball. Don’t

Do it. Oh, I’m not doing one near. Oh, no, no,

No. Don’t do it. I saw you do one with your interview with Harbaugh. Don’t do it.

Hey, regarding district Detroit, do you think the public would be more on board if he actually spent some money on his baseball team and gave a shit about that? I mean, I’m being somewhat serious.

I think that people would be more on board if they actually would know they’re getting something out the deal instead of just paying for another wish. Well,

I think that the first thing is that they did not fulfill their commitment in the first development

Deal. Oh, that’s huge. You’re right.

That’s the first thing. The second thing is that all of the language is intentional, but they’re not obligated. There’s a lot of ambiguous language in there. And if you’ve listened closely, they’re not bound to any of it. So it comes down to whether they want to or not. Yeah. There’s no accountability in that agreement.

Breaking news, financial breakdown. Oh, okay. This is
All right. All you wise guys did the work here. All right. 1.5 billion 818 million of which will be paid for by the city. I know what you’re saying. Those will be taxes generated by the new development. But let’s just break it down. So in order to make a 4% profit, they say if we don’t get the public credits, we only get 2% profit, but we want a 4% profit. That means everything we give them goes right into their pocket. Think about that. Now, if you take this deal 1.5 billion over 35 years, you’re talking about 45 million a year. They got a 42 million a year they got to make to break even. The deal is we give them 25 million. 25 million. So why is it double? Why isn’t it half the size? Why can’t mid-size development come in and actually pay for the police or the ambulance or the fire?
Yeah. Why do competitors of the mega projects have their taxes go up here in the downtown Detroit Authority and this downtown area, small business people get their property taxes raised in order to pay for these. It’s the small stuff. The 50 million forgivable loan. It’s called a Yep. Tax Incremental financing. That means they raise everybody’s taxes down here with the expectation that your values go up because this thing got built. And you get to pay for your competitor. That’s not capitalism, nor is 25 million out of 45 million capitalism. Nor is living in a neighborhood where this money’s getting siphoned out because police are needed in Midtown. It doesn’t work. Capitalism requires that you invest money, you make a profit. Not that you suck the fucking public guy. Yeah, this is 35 years. Well,

If it’s such a good project, just build it anyway.

35 years, which the state law says you can only have these tax captures for 20 years. So we just agreed on something that’s illegal. So if you want to know, if I know my business, just watch real close it. Going to be quiet for a minute and then they’re going to change the law in Lansing. It’s already done. Fade company, right? Fade

Company like they did for Gilbert. Remember they went and he went and they changed the Brownfield tax credit law for him for one of his developments. So you’re right.

It doesn’t work. Detroit’s gained no greater employment for the hockey arena. Remember Joe? Hey, remember hockey fans who know math Joe Lewis had 700 people working there. What does fucking Little Caesars have working there? Same bullshitted. You put in something smaller that can make money on its own and contribute to the revenue of Detroit. Detroit. Ladies and gentlemen, 42% of human beings that live in our capital city live bef below the fucking poverty line. 58% of children live below the poverty line. One more this for the suburbs. Love ya. I’m one of ya.
When it comes to school funding about eh $9,200 a year per pupil as required by law, that money is found in your property tax. Every city in this state gets the majority of their money from property tax. If your property tax can’t meet the $9,200 threshold, the state of Michigan sends you the rest. When you don’t raise your own money and the state comes to get it, where do they come get it from? Those that have money. So if it’s not deep in your heart that you care about people, just know you are paying for a billionaire who owns a casino and another billionaire that hadn’t paid federal taxes in five fucking years. Wow. Was that

Too much though? That’s crazy.

No, it’s perfect. Much better than, but

Also too o other cities, other municipalities around the country don’t fund private developments the way Detroit does. I mean, Charlie, you’ve looked at some other cities and other developments. They occur and are completed in a shorter period of time. They’re done based on the developer’s own investment without municipal input. Why does Detroit feel like the unattractive girl that’s got to pay for a date all the time?

Because we’re, we’re stupid because we know office space is a thing of the past. Yes, we know mixed use development is a thing of the past. We know we can’t make our pension payments. If Biden handed sent us 800 and something million of bullshit money, we haven’t even spent that money yet. The state hasn’t spent the money yet. You think inflation’s high. It’s not going away. Sorry. Just think about it. Just out of mutual respect. Think about it. We think a lot about it on this program. In fact, I came in here and laid down this shit to these friends of mine. Nobody does anything on their own. We all do stuff together, but we’re not going to read stuff and not do stuff on our own. And then ask you to drive around and listen. Derek, I hear, fuck you, dude. Fuck you. Fuck you. It’s coming. It’s coming to Windsor mother. Fuck it. It is. Enough. Enough. It’s a loser. Capitalists, capitalists. And we like everybody in this program. We like pinco economists. We like Wall Street Economist. Yeah. Anybody want to come on and shake it up? We’ll do it.

That’s the only way you going to get the whole story. You got to listen to everybody. You cannot just pick one side or

The other. You listen. You got to do the math. And do the math. Now, I call city council tonight.

You might need another cigarette to go. And it

Is. And I said, these tax captures right? We’re going to give you so much every year that we’re going to give them cash. That’s fact. They get a cash check every year. This is supposed to be based on the amount of business that this new thing’s creating employees, construction workers, renters, property tax increase. Sales tax increase. How does that get measured? Is is there a crew every year that goes through and does the actuarial business? Or is it simply an estimate arrived upon this year that’ll take us through 35 years. Get what I’m saying? Yes. Right. Is anybody going to actually look at what this is creating? Because STIs didn’t do it. LCA didn’t do it. The skyscraper didn’t do it. The book Cadillac didn’t do it. And you all saw red, red went, oh, they gave you the bullshit. Low income housing. You saw red on Monday. There ain’t no such fucking

Thing. Don’t, don’t exist.

No, no such thing. So how do you arrive at this number? They didn’t know. Well, I’m not voting for anything where I don’t know where there’s a guaranteed revenue stream. The thought is, it’s an estimate that will last forever no matter what they do. Not good business.

It’s like, but it also money behind bad money.

But it feeds into the emotion. They throw out things that are supposed to tap residency motions. Oh, this is how much it’s going to generate. These are the jobs that are going to be offered to Detroiters for which they don’t qualify. This is the housing that people can’t afford or that Red’s voucher doesn’t qualify for. So it’s just all of those terms that are supposed carrots before the horse and none of it has any substance, I mean at all.

Okay, check, check. Ready? Here’s how I know. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 17, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15. This little piggy was 16, 17, 18, 19, 20. Oh no, don’t. Charlie, don’t do this. You’re talking over my zipper. There it is. 21. See you next week. Just look at Karen. I’m head in hand. I’m over here with you. Karen, wish I could have ran out the seat right then. Oh God. Knowledge is power. Stay in school kids. Woo. Tell your daughter I’m proud of her. Keep you a in your pants. I hope she didn’t see that. That was my finger. What? Thank you. Well good. That was my belly button.

 

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